Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Project Reverb: Day 3

#Reverb13:  What was the braves thing you did in 2013?

I applied to be accepted in a Web Immersion bootcamp program in Denver last summer.  I had to make a five minute video.  Talk about being out of the comfort zone.

I thought the interview went really well.  I thought I was going to be accepted into the program.  Finally I had a clear path into finding my way back.

I didn't get in.

I asked for feedback.

I was told that "while I could be a programmer if I really wanted to pursue it, they felt that it would be intense, too fast paced for me".

After having been a programmer for most of the 90's and then a manager of a development team for another 10 years I wasn't sure what to do with their assessment.

Their words, their belief about me hurt.  It made me angry.  I felt insulted.

I stood in the face of that no and applied to another web immersion program.  This time I got accepted into the program.

I had to leave my family and relocate to another state for the length of the program.

Now, I have a seat at the table.

Sometimes I hear the whispers of that no and wonder if I can do this.  I could be the father of many of the students in this class.  I wonder what it is I am doing.  Can I do this again at my age?

So yes, I would say I am very brave right now.

I am showing up differently, I am raising my hand and finding my voice.  I am practicing making eye contact, being open and curious.

I am just as important as anyone else here for this training.

I gave Kelly a plaque that had this quote on it many years ago.

“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow.”
― Mary Anne Radmacher


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