Monday, March 29, 2010

Calf Attack!

Tonight I was going for a run using my new(old approach) to running.

I took one step and almost fell over from a sharp pain in my calf.

I get these sometimes when I am sleeping.  I will just move my leg and suddenly my calf feels like it is about to explode. 

I have woken up from these spasms screaming.  YIKES!

Tonight was the first time that has ever happened as I was about to exercise.  I tried to walk it off, but to no avail so I turned around and came back inside much to the dissapointment of my dog Harley.

Harley loves to sit on the couch and watch for me to return home.

We were both dissapointed tonight.

Sunday, March 28, 2010

A post about running

It has been a long time since I have written anything about running.

I ran for the first time today since Saint Patricks Day. 

I used to run six days a week and it seems like now I might run one day a week.

It is strange how running had gone from being something that used to bring me such joy has now become a chore.

I can't remember the last time I  really enjoyed being out for a run.

I keep wrestling with wondering if it is just time for me to trade my running shoes for my cycling shoes.

I may have run my last marathon and if that is the case that is okay.  I ran 16 marathons.  Something I never thought I would do or could do.

Along the way, I fell in love with a young girl that ended up changing my life in ways I would have never dreamed of.

I have met many amazing people and have some wonderful friendships with people that I hope one day I will be able to meet in person.

So for now, I am going back to the beginning. 

When I first started running, I learned how to run using my own modified version of the Jeff Galloway run/walk program.

Right now, running isn't fun for me and so I hope to go back and fall in love with running all over again.

Today, I walked for 90 seconds and ran for 30 seconds.  I repeated that  sequence 19 times.  I only ran 9.5 minutes over the 38 minutes.  I actually ran for the 30 second interval instead of the slogging through the run.

I would like to run another marathon again someday.  I don't know if I ever will.  Time will tell.

For now, I want to have fun again.

Has anyone ever run into a problem like this?  No pun intended.

What do you do to put the fun back into your running?

Saturday, March 27, 2010

A belated birthday present for my wife


24 years ago I planted this tree in our front yard on your birthday.

Erin, Sammy and Shasta were our kids when this tree was planted.

How this tree has grown during our lives together.  This tree has had to weather many storms, much like we have had to do.

I recently finished reading a book that  Kelly's Aunt Linda recommended, Have a Little Faith by Mitch Albom.

I wanted to share part of this story as  a belated birthday present to you. It is a conversation between a Rabbi and the author of the book and I think it has a great message about commitment, faith and love.

"On the other hand, a true love can enrich itself.  It gets tested and grows stronger.  Like in Fiddler on the Roof, when Tevye asks, "Do you love me?".

A husband and wife whose love  is proven through action, not words.

"When she says, 'How can you ask if I love you?  Look at all I've done with you. What else would you call it?'

"That kind of love-the kind you realize you already have by the life you've created together--that's the  kind that lasts".

"I think people expect too much from marriage today, he said. They expect perfection. Every moment should be bliss. That's TV or the movies. But that is not the human experience.

"Twenty good minutes here, forty good minutes there, it adds up to something beautiful.  It's okay that the other one nudges you a little, bothers you a little.  It's part of being close to someone".

"But he joy you get from that same closeness, when you watch your children, when you wake up and smile at each other, that as our tradition teaches us, is a blessing.  People forget that".

Why do they forget it, I asked.

"Because the word 'commitment' has lost it's meaning.  I'm old enough to remember when it used to be a positive. A committed person  was someone to be admired. Now a commitment is something you avoid. You don't want to tie yourself down.

"It's the same way with faith, by the way.  We don't want to get stuck having to go to services all of the time, or having to follow the rules. We don't want to commit to God.  We'll take him when we need him, or when things are going good. But real commitment?  That requires staying power, in faith and in marriage".

And if you don't commit?

"Your choice.  But you miss what is on the other side".

What's on the other side?

"Ah.".  He smiled.  "A happiness you cannot find alone".

Thank you for being there on the other side for me.

  Now my question for you.  It's a real question :)

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Kelly's gift

It is so hard to believe that it has been two years that Kelly has been gone.

I wore my Saint Patricks Day tie to work again with the special locket of Kelly that her parents sent to me before the last marathon I ran.

I took one of her scarves to work with me as well. I held her close to my heart throughout the day.

After work, I picked up my friend Brittany and we went to a Team in Training Patient Hero social.  It was good to be able to spend the evening with Brittany.  She knew how much Kelly means to me.  Brittany was a rock of support for me last year as the one year anniversary of her passing approached.

One of the other team heroes for this season name is Kelly.  She asked me what my connection was.

I got to tell her just a litte bit about my connection to Kelly and the impact she had on my life.

I was Kelly's runner for almost nine years of her life.  What a gift that was to me...

I had another gift from Kelly that was waiting.

I had wanted to do this last year on the one year anniversary of her passing.  The day came and went and I couldn't act on it.  

Now another year was passing. If I don't do this today, will I wait another year? Do I have another year?

I talked with Sue about this a couple days before.  I wanted to put this into existence. 

It was something I really wanted to do to honor Kelly, her life and all she stood for.

I talked to a trusted friend at work about it during the day.  She offered her support and gave me a couple of things to read.

I dropped Brittany off after dinner and drove over to one of the places I like to run at when it is dark.  The streets are very well lit and there is little traffic.

I changed into my running clothes.  I carefully removed the locket from my tie and kissed the picture of Kelly and told her that I love her.  I cradled her scarf next to my cheek, something she wore after losing her hair. 

I ran for sixty minutes, enjoying the time I was spending in solitude with my thoughts of Kelly.

My life was changed forever in January 1999 when I first began running for Kelly.  We lived 900 miles apart and became the best of friends.  We shared an unbreakable bond of love with one another and nothing could ever touch that.  Certainly not cancer.

My relationship with my family is so much closer because of Kelly. 

Sue became a Christian because of Kelly's faith.

I got home at 11:45. The day was almost over.

I prayed and asked for Jesus to come into my life.

I wanted to save Kelly's life  through my running and raising money for a cure and somehow it was through Kelly's life and her love, her faith and joy that saved mine instead.

I love you Kelly.

Sunday, March 7, 2010


Tutu is actually samoan or something other than Hawaiian - But, it is used in Hawaii very frequently; it is a respectful way to say grandma.

Sue's grandmother passed away earlier today at the age of 93.  She was living in Hawaii when her first grandchild was going to be born.   She told everybody that she was going to be a Tutu(Grandmother) and that name stuck. 

Everyone called her Tutu.

When I first met Tutu in 1982, she was excited about going moose hunting in Alaska.  She was 65 and I thought she was pretty hip.

I found out today that it was a well kept family secret that while Tutu loved to go hunting, she was a terrible shot so the moose were in little danger of her.

Tutu loved her family and as the matriarch of the family would beam proudly at her ever glowing clan and say to everyone, "Look what I started".

So Tutu, I want to thank you for the incredible family you started.  I am honored to be married to one of your granddaughters, and have been blessed to raise two of your great grandchidren.

Tutu is surived by her daughter Shirley, seven grandchildren, 11 great grandchildren and one great-great Krazy baby.

I hope she finds some good hunting and fishing with her husband Henry and her daughter Sherri.

Aloha Tutu...

A, ala, watchful, alertness

L, lokahi, working with unity

O, oia'i'o, truthful honesty

H, ha'aha'a, humility

A, ahonui, patient perseverance

The kahuna David Bray interprets this code as "Come forward, be in unity and harmony with your real self, God, and mankind. Be honest, truthful, patient, kind to all life forms, and humble." He also stated that to the Hawaiian of old, Aloha meant "God in us."

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Happy Birthday Laiken

Happy Birthday Laiken,

Just wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you, wondering what kind of a party you had today.

There will be thousands of runners at the Disney Princess 1/2 marathon tomorrow.  I know you and Kelly will be cheering the Team in Training runners on as they run to honor their angels.

Light, Love and Hugs to you on your birthday!!! 

Friday, March 5, 2010

What would you do with 37 days?

I stumbled on this post a couple of days ago and I was struck how when I said my last good-bye to Kelly she had 37 days left to live.

During her last 37 days, she had things she wanted to accomplish:

Attend and support a fundraiser for Children's Hospital.

Attend and support a  fundraiser for the Ronald McDonald House.

Typical Kelly.  She chose to make a difference and give back during those last 37 days.

She wanted to make it back home to be with her family and friends and her dogs and she did.

I think she did a lot of living those last 37 days.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Disney Memories with Kelly

I have several bloggy, facebook, twitter friends running the Disney princess half marathon this weekend in Orlando and I got to thinking about the magical days that Adam and I spent with Kelly and her family nine years ago.

I even got a signed Kelly Grubb original that I will always treasure.

Kelly, being the kind and sweet person that she is, made this for me when she found out the Tigger was my favorite Winnie the Pooh character.

The last day of the trip, we went to the character breakfast where Kelly, Adam, Molly and Rose all collected numerous autographs.

A weekend filled with a lifetime of memories to treasure. 

Kelly and her family really taught me the importance of making memories.  One of the many lifetime gifts I received by being a part of Kelly's journey, being a part of her family.

I was just awestruck the entire time we spent together.  The look of joy on her face at the California Adventure ride when Tinker Bell flies over Cinderalla's castle is something I will never forget.

Just one of many of the once in a lifetime memories I have of Kelly.

Thanks Kelly, for being my friend, my hero, my inspiration.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

The Run for Water

I can't even fathom this.

Women and children in developing countries average walk to get clean water is 6K. That is 3.7 miles.

I get my bottled water delivered to my front door and I think it is a pain to bring it in from the porch and
replace the empty container when it is time.

I thought this sounded like a neat idea from Active.Com.  There isn't a current running event planned in the Denver area.

Please click here and read more about this cause and see if there is an event in your area.

A New Day

This is the beginning of a new day.
I have been given this day to use as I will.
I can waste it or use it for good.
What I do today is important because
I'm exchanging a day of my life for it.
When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever, leaving in its place whatever I have traded it for.
I pledge to myself that it shall be. . .
Gain, not loss,
Good, not evil,
Success, not failure
In order that I shall not regret the price I paid for this day-Anonymous

How will you spend this day?