Last of the Firsts

A year has passed.

Kelly has been gone for a year.

I did not want to be sad today. I would not be honoring her by choosing sorrow over joy.

I wanted to celebrate her life today and I did.

I wore my cheerful Saint Patrick’s Day tie to work.

I pinned Kelly’s charm next to my heart so I could keep her close to me.

Shayna sent me tons of love, light and courage from California.

I heard from many of my friends on Facebook sending their support.

The TNT coach of the Ohio chapter was going to say a toast to Kelly after work.

I talked to my friends at work about Kelly throughout the day.

I gathered with my friends and family after work at the Team in Training social in celebration of Kelly’s life.

Rebecca Russell, the executive director of the Rocky Mountain chapter for the Leukemia and Lymphoma society told me that was the best she had seen me look in a long time. Today of all days, I wanted to be joyful for Kelly.

I hugged two of the Mom’s that have the closest of ties to blood cancer.

Krizstina’s son Brandan(2 years old) is fighting a dangerous form of AML.

Desiree’s daughter Melina, earned her angel wings at the age of 5 months.

That was the only time I almost cried was when I hugged Krizstina and Desiree.

I was so happy to see them. Their support meant so much to me.

People made impromptu donations to further the mission of the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society and to honor Kelly.

I drove home and called Brittany. She had worked her entire shift carrying an Eeyore stuffed animal in her apron. She had kept Kelly close to her today.

Somehow I made it through the day.

Today was the last of the firsts.

It is time to move forward.

I know that is what Kelly wants for me.

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